Posts Tagged ‘separation’

Ever felt like you have something you need to get off your chest, something you need to share? Ever felt like you need a safe space to share your thoughts, to openly write about something that is on your mind? I know I have felt like that. I have felt that opening myself up and sharing what’s on my mind, could also open the floodgates for criticism, judgement and people misunderstanding my purpose behind sharing. Sometimes sharing is just enough to lighten the load. Sharing helps if only just to get if off your chest.

For this reason, I am going to host a blog post or 2, for a wonderful friend who needs somewhere to share the things that are on her mind. And for different reasons, would rather to share it on a blog that is not as accessible to family and friends. I guess there are times in life when you need the freedom to express whats on your mind.

I don’t love you anymore.

Perhaps not the worst words one can hear. But absolutely devastating nonetheless.

Only a few months ago my life changed irrevocably when I heard those words.

First, denial, incredulity and searing pain – unimaginable pain that the person whom I trusted most in the world could withdraw his love from me.  And do it so easily, so completely, in just five words.

But there I was; dying inside and putting a smile on my face for my two young sons, my visiting family and my brand new job.

A very wise friend told me that I would be glad to have that new job, despite my fear that this was the worst time possible to start a new career. She said it would see me through.

How right she was.

As my marriage changed overnight from happy and successful to one reminiscent of a pile of cold damp ash, my friends (both old and new) rallied around me and my job gave me confidence, hope and Joy.

It’s not easy – not by a long shot. But, you know what, I’m still here. And I can still smile.

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